Do you wanna build a snowman?
by Kato Chinatsu
Summary: Do you wanna build a snowman? Come on, let's go and play. I never see you any more. Come out the door. It's like you've gone away-... We used to be best buddies... And now we're not. I wish you would tell me why-... Do you wanna build a snowman? It doesn't have to be a snowman...


_**Kato**__: This is a fan fiction bet that I had with magnipisika16. Despite it being a bet, I kind of like how this turned out as an angst fic._

_**Theme of the Story**__: Do you wanna build a snowman?_

_**Back-story**__: Basically, I was listening to the song and I just thought how it would be if it were delivered in a more saddening demeanor. So I told my friend of this and thus, the bets. You guys should check out their stories. They may not be of the same fandom, but they have really great authors with amazing ideas._

_**Disclaimer: **__Kuroko no Basket solely belongs to Fujimaki Tadatoshi._

_If the story is not appealing to the respective reader, feel free to press the back button. Thank you for the consideration of reading this!_

* * *

**_Spring_**

There was a massive and gaping void on his chest, throbbing in excruciating and exquisite pain with each passing second... or intake of breath. Nimble fingers occasionally trembled, almost inconspicuous with every fruitless attempt at regaining lost fragments of memories from the scattered complexity of the tresses of his mind. As such with his hopeless state, tears unintentionally cascaded down sickly pale cheeks before dripping to the elongated blades, emerald-green hues of the grass upon his feet.

A sad, melodious song played in rendition on his mind whenever he stood by that silent presence dwelling a few feet before him. It might be brought upon by his attire; a flimsy hospital gown that barely reached past his trembling knees, but a prickling sense of coldness filled his being as he knelt. His dull powder-blue hues fixated firmly on the name written with delicate precision on the cold surface of the polished gravestone.

_In the loving memory of Akashi Seijuuro_

That was as far as his eyes had gotten before they clouded up, blurred by crystalline-like tears flowing continuously from his eyes. For... For what reason? It was just a name his mind refused to let go. It was just a name that was not lost with the thousand memories he had come to forget. Yet, that mere name could induce his body to such a hopeless and pathetic state.

An unexplainable surge of warmth and contrasting sadness flooded his erratically palpitating heart at that moment. The gaping hole in his chest forcibly widened further, paving way for that excruciating pain he thought he had managed to reduce. Without a care to the world before him, his thin arms reached forward, wrapping themselves in an awkward grasp over the cold gravestone. It was a pathetic display, but it was keeping him whole somehow.

Because it was a name of someone he knew he must have held dear. Otherwise, he would not be mourning over the loss of a person whom he had no vague memory of.

Having no grasp of time, he valiantly clung onto the gravestone of a dead man's name until its comfort lulled him to sleep. From afar, cobalt-blue hues watched the lamenting male with an expression no lesser than sympathy. There were no words that could be spoken to relieve the indescribable pain his friend was enduring at that very moment. Losing the person he cherished far beyond anything else... and losing his memory of the said person. Life was simply that cruel.

_He was your everything, Tetsu. He gave his life to keep you alive. Now... do your part and keep living for him._

An intangible soul watched the sleeping male the whole time, mournful eyes unchanging even as the male was being taken away from the unfavorable grounds. Unable to leave the grounds where he dwelled upon, he sat by the elongated blades of the dew-covered grass, awaiting for that person to come back.

Because he knew he would come back. Eventually, that would be where his fragile heart would lead him to.

With his eyelids fluttering close, thin lips parted slowly, paving way for that sad, melodious song no one would ever hear. It was a child's song that he had heard repetitively being sung by a kindergarten, but the mannerism by which he sang it sounded far too wounded. Not that his blank expression reflected his emotions.

_Do you wanna build a snowman?_

_Come on, let's go and play_

_I never see you anymore_

_Come out the door_

_It's like you've gone away-_

Liquid crimson and raw siena pupils lifted up to the steel-gray tinted sky above.

The sky lamented with them, bathing the ground with its own tears.

* * *

A hollow man faced the open window, the view partly obstructed by the flimsy white curtain that draped over it, fluttering against the soft breeze that ever so occasionally dishevel his messy aquamarine locks. Not that the view mattered either way as the look in those twin pupils were far-off from the environment about him. For days, he spoke to no one despite their sympathetic pleas and delivered condolences for his loss-... Loss of a man whom he knew simply by name.

His answers to inquiries by respective doctors concerning his condition were kept minimal. Just a simple judgment between 'Yes' or 'No' without having to further elaborate on his response. Though the doctors attempted to have him provide even just the slightest bit more of details, their efforts had been useless as he remained completely silent. Nurses freely come and go as they wished, monitoring his stable condition from time-to-time though hardly necessary given that his state of mind was stable to a certain extent.

All attempts at lightening him up or to have him more at ease were easily cast aside by his stubborn indifference and highly reserved nature. He did not allow anyone pass the walls he had unintentionally built around himself. Because none of them understood his predicament. Their statements that spoke up knowing what he was undergoing were mere lies. None of them knew. None of them knew...

_What happened to him?_

Every utterance of the same inquiry induced his breath to hitch in anticipation of an answer that had long been denied from him. His absent eyes would undoubtedly focus and his ears would perk inconspicuously as he awaited with bated breath. But the response would always be concise, not elaborative. Restricted in some sense itself.

_Kuroko Tetsuya had been involved in a car accident. He... lost the most important person in his life and the memories that came along with that person._

No name had been uttered aside from his own, as if the other name in itself had been forbidden to be spoken. If that person valued highly in his life, what right did they have to conceal information from him? None of his acquaintances provided him an explanation or tried to make light conversation outside the topic of his current condition. As if the smallest of slip could impact them as their greatest mistakes. Not even his so-called best friend; a man of cobalt-blue hair and eyes by the name of Aomine Daiki. excusing himself repeatedly with a repetitive excuse that his action of taking him to that grave... the person he was sure whose identity was being hidden from him... had been a _mistake_.

The frail woman he had come to know as his mother visited him one fine day, her hands pressed firmly against her lips to muffle cries of lament the male had difficulty to shed. It had just been one question he had asked of. One question that induced her to break down to her knees and weep for what seemed like hours.

_Who was Akashi Seijuuro?_

There were frequent cases, none that he opted to ask. A middle-aged woman screaming repeatedly from the hallway, _'Give me back my son!' _whilst a man sickly murmured dozens of threats in an equally loud voice. He had the knowledge to know that they were directed at him as it was acquaintances of him that were doing the effort of calming the old couple down, preventing them from bursting into his ward to haul accusatory words of everything being his fault.

None of them knew his pain. None of them knew. Not even he himself knew the extent of the pain he was shouldering.

It was in those days that he listened with utmost attentiveness at the sad, melodious song that had repeatedly lulled him to sleep, picking out the tenor of a velvet voice his mind tried so valiantly to forget though he forcefully prevented from doing so. He could not afford to forget anymore of that man he knew simply by name. With every memory forgotten, the void in his chest increased further as with the excruciating pain that came along with it.

Absent-mindedly fiddling with the pristine white sheets in his lap, his lips then parted, paving way for his saccharine-sweet voice to sing the song that remained partially intact in his cluttered mind.

_...We used to be best buddies_

_And now we're not_

_I wish you would tell me why-_

_Do you wanna build a snowman?_

_It doesn't have to be a snowman..._

A miniscule smile graced his then chapped lips for a split second, just before fresh tears cascaded down his sickly pale cheeks.

* * *

_**Autumn**_

_Someone is waiting down there_, was what he had convinced himself. Staring longingly at the marked gravestone from a considerably far distance, sheltered by the shadows of wilting trees and draping curtains of autumn leaves, a tinge of warmth seeped through his palpitating heart. Wanting to close that distance, yet unable to as he was forbidden from doing so. The parents of the person dwelling there forbid him under any circumstances. Was it not enough that he remember not a single thing of that person he supposedly valued above everything else?

They kept everything hidden from him... took away anything that could remind him of that person in his life. Glancing about the life that he continued to live, there was just something that was lacking... something that was missing. Yet, he possessed no inkling of what it was.

But in that field where that specific gravestone rested upon, he found temporary completion in his heart and body. His mind struggled to salvage whatever memory remained. But even then, it was scarce. How could he remember when everything was being kept hidden from him?

For his sake? He had a stable mind. He simply needed to know. He simply needed to why that person could leave such a huge scar on his life.

Parting his lips ever so slowly for a deep intake of breath, he struggled with his mind to recall that melodious song that had long stopped playing in his mind. His saccharinely sweet voice fleeted along with the gentle breeze, reaching expectant ears of the listening soul.

_... I think some company is overdue_

_I've started talking to_

_The pictures on the walls-..._

His voice trailed off before his words could possibly end up sounding choked at the implication of an ironical statement. Nothing. Even pictographic images were taken away from him. Something was always amiss when he was alone in his supposed residence. There was something lacking in that spacious place and he could vividly see glimpses of supposed photographs gone from the walls. Most especially at night, he could feel that excruciating pain surfacing over and over again as he curled ever tightly on the wide double bed.

Pathetic. His state was utterly pathetic.

No one knew of his pain. Perhaps though, the person dwelling upon that grave did.

As he fully turned around to head back, his body seemed to lock itself on its own as he found himself unable to move as if someone had held him fast from behind. But no one was there, he convinced himself as he glanced along his chest. No one was there... physically. As what transpired before, the excruciating pain induced by the gaping hole in his chest considerably lessened. A voice was whispering the song directly to his ears with such a loving tone, contradicting his pained one.

_It gets a little lonely..._

_All these empty rooms,_

_Just watching the hours tick by-_

He had to chuckle at the sheer mockery on that velvet voice at the identically ironical statement. But the laugh was rather short-lived.

That person had always been waiting for him to pay a visit all throughout the months that he had been away since his first visit. Knowing that the bluenette could not cross that distance, he crossed it on his own just to be with that person whose mind had forgotten of his existence but his heart and body retained. It was painful, but it had to suffice.

Underneath the backdrop of cascading orange autumn leaves, he remained still, allowing for that warmth to temporarily fill in the void on the gaping hole of his chest.

* * *

**_Winter_**

Falling back to the old pattern of one's life had been... undeniably difficult. Despite being in the comforts of his former job that entitled him to educate young children, something was obviously gone from the picture. Even his co-workers had taken notice as he awaited every single day on the steps of the kindergarten, his body unconsciously waiting for someone to arrive... but no one came. Or how he would simply stand by the phone during the hours of lunch as if awaiting for someone to make a call for him. He was back, but he was not whole.

But that day had been different. There was a nagging sensation that there was something that needed to be done. He was fidgety and his dull powder-blue eyes were moving about relentlessly. His mind was in a state of confusion whereas his body was forcing him to move. It hurts, but he did not allow it to show on the surface.

Excusing himself for an early leave, he left the premises with sympathetic eyes lingering upon the expanse of his back. Of course they knew what the day was, but they, like the rest, were forbidden from uttering anything that could spike up the bluenette's mind.

Eventually, they thought to themselves, he would know. His body was already acting impulsively on the systematic pattern his life had been molded to. And today was no exception.

It was the 20th of December.

* * *

It was not surprising that he found his body dragging him to that very spot. Just as before, he hesitated to close the distance, knowing that he was not permitted to be near. But, the overwhelming urge to close it... as well as the pair of invisible, expectant heterochromatic eyes of a person that awaited for him brushed all his hesitance away. Kneeling before that patch of snow-covered ground, he rested his hands upon his lap and gazed forward with solemn eyes.

The gravestone was then thickly covered with a pristine white blanket of snow, almost entirely concealing the name from his view. With one of his naked hands, he brushed off the snow, the distinct form of his breath fanning against the delicately written name on the gravestone. Murmuring a low prayer to himself, his hand repetitively caressed the surface of the name before an ever so polite and miniscule smile made its way to his quivering lips.

December 20th. Not an ounce of knowledge did he have on the implication of the date, but to him, that was in itself insignificant at the moment. To the soul of Akashi Seijuuro, it was not important. Just his mere presence there that signified of his body remembering the occasion was more than enough.

Allowing for his eyes to fully close, he rested the full weight of his body against the cold surface of the gravestone, ignoring the prickling coldness against his cheeks. Gradually, his body started to feel numb while his frame wracked by series of unforgiving trembles. But he showed no care. Despite the heavy torrent of snow beating down against his body, he remained glued to his position with no intent of leaving the gravestone. _Only a fool would stay_, he thought to himself, seeing as no one was around. But he simply could not leave.

In the morning, he would remain in that same spot. His eyes would be delicately closed shut as would his lips, and a peaceful expression would dawn upon his features. That he knew himself as he found himself incapable of moving.

Parting his quivering lips, he sang in a hushed whisper the melodious music that remained in his mind; his saccharinely sweet voice lost with the howling of the wind.

_... I know you're in there._

_-... where you've been_

_They say "have courage", and I'm trying to..._

_I'm right out here for you, just-..._

Despite the deathly cold howling wind slapping against his pale skin with full force, a surge of comforting warmth flooded his being. At that moment, he knew of the reason why. Even if his mind had forgotten, his body could never forget that person... no matter who he was to his life.

That ever so velvet voice crooned to him, gently lulling him to sleep with that melodious tone he had grown ever so fond of.

_We only have each other_

_It's just you and me_

_What are we gonna do?_

His eyes closed in complete resignation as the thick blanket of snow compiled over the frame of his trembling form. And yet, even as the tresses of eternal slumber welcomed him, he felt complete.

* * *

On the morning of the _21st _of _December_, the sky ceased mourning.

* * *

_Thank you for reading!_


End file.
